i just needed to take a moment to talk about how sweet my husband is. 

gosh. he's darling. 

he is good to me every single day. 
no matter what. 
even when he's tired. 
even when his back is really hurting him. 
even when i was a total jerk face to him. again.

he's the nicest 'ol guy on the block. 

he leaves for work each morning and i'm still in bed so he either kisses my sleeping face or he leaves me be and texts me as soon as he knows i'm up. 
yesterday he said i'm super pretty even fresh out of bed.
 i mean.. that's every girl's dream because we know it's so not true. 

that's just one thing that i love that's changed in him. 
he used to be a really grumpy bear man in the mornings. he just needed like an hour to himself to gather his thoughts and open his eyes fully for the day. but as his relationship with The Lord grows, he's completely changed into this bright-eyed joyful and of course his yelling self in the mornings! it's fantastic. he jumps over our huge bed to my side after he's all dressed and ready for work and cuddles me up. he's smiling and just beaming.
it's the best thing ever to see and be a part of. 

i'm living the life better then any romance novel or movie ever made. 
and i've pretty much seen them all. 

sometimes i feel guilty that i have it so good. 
sometimes i feel annoying. 
sometimes i think it's too good to be true. 
it's fake. 
it will end. it just has to. 
 i'm just waiting for that day to come where he is no longer like this. 

but then i remember why he's so good. and why our marriage rocks. 

my husband loves Jesus. 

he's a transformed man. 
he adores seeking The Lord in all that he does. 
how to be a husband. how to be a worker. 
how to be a stranger. how to be a friend. 
how to witness. how to lead. how to spend. how to save. how to everything. 

his number one is Jesus. his number two is me. 
his number three is everyone/everything else. 
that's why our marriage works. beautifully. 

he's leading us well. i'm so thankful for his heart. 

i asked him if he would be disappointed in me if ______ didn't happen. 
or if i couldn't do this or that. 
you know, just having a doubting in myself day. 
he said that the only thing that would ever disappoint him 
is if i stop seeking to be a Godly woman/wife. 
that's a good husband. 

so keep seeking i shall! 

as i seek, i become a better wife to ethan. 
i'm able to submit to him as he leads our household. 
i'm able to put aside selfish desires of my own and am able to serve him better. 
when i spend quiet time with Jesus, everything about me is better.

i'm so thankful for a love like this and a Love like this. 
i have the two greatest lovers ever. Jesus and ethan.