just 4 things we do || love burt living || ethan and bethany burt || the wife life

we like being married. 
we think it's swell. 
we think we're pretty good at it. 
i mean, it's almost been 4 years. so we're experts. 

but really. 
we're learning as we go. and there are some things i think we do well. 

so i'm going to share 4 things that we do. 
i hope they make you happy. 


{one} 
greetings. 
we take the time to remember to greet each other. 
sometimes life is fast, right? it's crazy busy and you just "don't have the time"
i get it. cause i don't have the time either. 
we have to take/make the time. 
i'll be in the middle of editing a wedding and he'll come home from the store. 
i make the decision to stop what i'm doing to go greet him. 
he smiles and is so happy to see me. 
i get a moment to breath him in and forget about the zillions of photos i have to edit that people are waiting on. and we enjoy each other. 
then, back to work. 
he could be busy working on the house but he'll pause and come see me in the office. 
just to kiss me. or to smell my neck. 
it forces us to remember the sweetness of this fleeting life. 
of having a best friend to spend life with. 
life is so fast and when i'm old i won't want to talk about how much i worked and how much money i made, i want to talk about how well i loved my husband. and how awesome he was at being a wonderful husband to me. 
when we choose busyness, we are a bit sadder. and over time, we really miss each other. 
it happens quickly. 
when i choose the editing over the quick run to the door to kiss and greet him. 
when he is too tired from laboring and sweating that he doesn't stop to tell me he loves me.
we get sad. and we grow distant. 
why choose that when you can choose to take pauses and enjoy the moment. 
that's all it is. a small moment but it makes all the difference in the world for your day.
and for his day. 
i will always stop to greet him. 
i will never allow life to get too busy that i stop seeing him.
i will greet him sweetly when he comes through that door. 

{two}
tag team chores. without complaining. 
like dishes. 
mostly dishes. really. because i think every human hates doing dishes. 
because dishes are from the devil. 
they pile up too fast. they are disgusting. 
they are not fun to do. 
they are stupid. 
we'd rather drink coffee or go outside. 
but, they need to be done. 
this used to be more of a struggle and we'd maybe complain a little
but we've gotten a pretty sweet system down. 
we read each other really well and try to help each other out. 
ethan knows how much i enjoy a clean stove and he cleans it for me. 
he hates washing silverware so i try to remember to get to that so he doesn't have to and leave the harder to scrub dishes for him. 
i enjoy dusting. so i dust. 
i enjoy laundry so i do laundry. 
there's something so silly sweet about folding my husband's clothes that brings my heart endless joy. i remember when we were first married and i cried over his undershirts one day. i'm that silly in love with having a husband to fold laundry for. praise God for all this time we have to be married and in love. i love everything about this sweet life. 
i can't work a vacuum so he cheerfully sweeps and vacuums the house. 
he knows that i like the living room blankets folded so he folds them and places them on the couch. 
team. work. boom. 

{three}
cheering each other on.
man, i believe in that dude.  
building up your husband is huge, lady friends. 
i have this one look, i haven't seen it but i'd surely die if i could see myself give it. 
it can tear my house down in an instant. 
our husbands are very affected by us. 
i can choose to build him up or ruin him. 
i have to be good to his heart and soul so he has energy and gusto to take on the world! 
he's got a lot of work to do and a lot of people to love and he can't do that if i make him feel like a tiny worthless man. 
this one i am working on daily and will have to my whole marriage. 
i pray to get wise on this one. 
there are ways that i don't even know i'm doing it.. 
sometimes like the look.. that just break him. hard. 
i have to be very aware of my looks, my words, my actions. 
so that he knows that i'm on his side. 
that i think he's awesome. 
he's my hero. 
he's worth so much. 

{four} 
TALKING
it's amazing to me how much couples DON'T talk. 
like, what? 
we talk about everything. 
it's gets real. fast. 
we don't let anything go unresolved. 
upset with me? let's hash it out.
i think you're being a jerk. i'm about to tell you and we're about to have this out. 
we do. 
it's good. 
we'd rather go 45 minutes (or a full day. whatever. sometimes it happens) in a heated talk, working through really hard life stuff than a 30 year marriage of bitterness and resentment and unresolved issues. 
NO THANK YOU. 
i'm not about to be that married couple. 
we're going to be old and happy. 
we're going to be annoyingly adorable our whole marriage because we work crap out. 
we are two sinners trying to live together. 
it gets messy. 
that's OK. 
work it out! 
it's so so good. it's so sweet to trust your whole heart to your spouse.
  you know you can put it all out there and they still love you because they want to!
because you're awesome to love. 
and it's okay to be totally honest with how they're sucking at marriage. 
it's how we grow. 
we need to be ready and prepared to hear those things that are hard to hear sometimes but honesty is always better. 
also, it's okay to put things off because you're having a spat. 
being late to something happens sometimes when you need to have a come to Jesus talk with your spouse. 
the church bbq or family birthday party can wait. your marriage can't. 
take the time to talk with your spouse. 
ask how you can improve.
gently tell how they can improve.  
take notes. 
improve. 
be thankful. 
strive to be better and enjoy your marriage to the fullest. 

these are just 4 things. 
but there are lots more things. 

some of those things include : 
making out. 
taking lots of pictures together. 
being silly. 
dating each other a lot. 
worshiping together. 
bible studies. 
drinking coffee. 
eating dark chocolate. 
 impersonations. 
cooking together. 
staying up late. 
sunday morning cuddles.
laughing. 
etc.